May 3, 2009
Race: Sonora RR
Category: Masters 35+ 123
Teammates: Rob, Scott, Rich and Andrew
And so it begins....
There are a few races every year that you really remember the details of, here is one. Sonora is buried in the foothills about 2hrs south east of Sacramento and on the way to Yosemite. The forecast called for rain and it had been steady for the past couple of days. The pre-reg was barely hanging on and to be honest I was not excited about doing this race. In fact I don't think anyone really was. When it comes to racing you are either all in or all out. Most times you don't even know you are all out until after it's all said and done. Those times when you think "I will wait and see and decide in the moment how much to commit" end up being the same situation when you look back and say "my heart was never in it to begin with".
So there it is raining, cold, low turn-out etc and this is a new race. There are railroad tracks that need to be crossed twice per lap, which played havoc I think for every group out there. Before the race starts my big ring shifter snaps off and I get stuck in my big ring. The race starts and we are sent the wrong way which we don't notice until we are almost completely around the course. However, there are only 6 of us in the race to begin with so turning the group around is pretty easy. As we turn around, my front chain ring drops from the big ring to the little ring. The important part to remember here is that I can't shift it in any direction since the lever had broken off at the start line. So I am now on a bike that thinks it's in the big ring that is really in the little chain ring. So annoying!
We get ourselves turned around and start our way back through the course and still haven't seen the finish line. We make it around to the finish line explain what happened and continue on.
Railroad tracks.....
At the top of the climb are some railroad tracks across the road at a gradual angle....gradual enough whip the bike right out from underneath Scott, Rich and one other guy who I don't know. Hematoma on Scotts hip and we ride on. Now keep in mind we have been out racing at this point an hour and a half, we haven't seen the whole course yet and I am frustrated and to add insult to injury it's still raining. It is at this point that I tell Rob who drove with me to Sonora that we are going home next time around. At the start/finish area we took a left and went to the car not without falling one more time on the railroad tracks.
The day was a bummer for sure, I don't think you'd get much of an argument there from any of us. However, there was something that was not so obvious that needed to be addressed; it's the idea that when you commit to something you tend to finish it against the odds. Your mind is in a different space where being "done" doesn't happen until it's done. This race, I for one was not committed to. To say that I made the right choice for safety and for the shear ridiculousness of it all could surely be argued. But that doesn't help me race stronger.
With that I now do my best to get my head into the space of being committed all the way to a race regardless of the outcome; to be in it for winning. If I look at the races we have done since then, I think we all, as a team did a little of that and now race with just a bit more surety than before. I remind myself that it's a process not an outcome. Racing success comes with steady patience and seeing beyond the immediate moment and to that point, it is my commitment.
